Loop, Loop, Decades

Wednesday, April 2, 2025

The madness of transcendence.
The manic dance of neurons.
A skip toward the better.
Nothing in my way.
I’m flying.
But nothing has changed.

Call it chemistry.
But I’m in heaven.

A peace, for just a second.
Things stopped hurting.
Things actually worked.

Oh my god.
Is this what sane breathing feels like?
Most people live in this air.
I can’t believe it.

I’m spiraling.
The gravity is on me.
Thoughts submerged.
My self,
drowning in a copy of me,
powered by anxiety.

I’m not free.
Compulsion.
A slave to this.
Bit and bridle.
And still,
I’m bucking.

Crack out the whip.
Make me do the work.
Keep me in line.
Paymaster Three Thousand.

There’s a lane.
A strict rule of operation
on this road.
All this power.
All this ego.

But mostly,
it works.

Look at them.
All lined up.
Patient.
Dancing.
Singing.
Forgetting what’s happening.

It’s too much
to tackle right now.

This vast array
of weaponized machinery
makes me reach
for a hand to hold.
Someone
to charge the end of the world with.

Let’s love each other
through the apocalypse.

Love, love, love.
I’ll wait.

Loop, loop, decades.
You and me,
wondering where it went.

I’ll be thinking about you.